Don't try to juice a banana

Now that I have Netflix in the bedroom again, I've been watching documentaries at night. The other night I watched Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. It was a terrific documentary. If it doesn't inspire you to run out and buy a juicer and heaps of kale, then there is something wrong with you. I did run out and buy a juicer.


This one here.

I've learned a few things:
1. Parsley doesn't juice very well in it. I had whole sprigs of parsley in the pulp thingie.
2. You can't juice a banana.
3. Most greens smell like burning something when juiced.
4. I heard you poop a lot but that's not the case for me.
5. I'm burping greens like there's no tomorrow. Gross.
6. It's quite the production. It takes at least 30 minutes to prep the foods, make a cup of juice, and clean the beast.
7. The produce costs around a million dollars.

In the movie, the two guys went on a juice fast for 60 days and really turned their health around. A woman did the juice fast for 10 and felt great. Yeah, I'm not doing that. I'm just having a cup of juice in the mornings. This morning was turnip greens, spinach, parsley (maybe one drop from 3 handfuls), carrot, cucumber, lemon, and apple. I guesss some people would think it's nasty but it's surprisingly tasty.

Pleeeeease release meee, let me go. . .

I applied for a transfer to a different department at work. I currently work in the busiest department and am very good at what I do. That, my friends, is the reason I will not be allowed to transfer. They don't want me leaving my area because I'm too gosh-dang good there. The other reason, of course, is that the store manager hates me. This isn't just me thinking she hates me. I mean, don't most of us feel that our boss hates us sometimes? This is real. She actually told the other supervisors and one of them let the cat out of the bag. Oh well. I still really, really like my job.

I JUST WANT THIS FRICKIN TRANSFER!

While I am very good at my current job, I would also be very, very good at the job I am applying for. It also has way better hours. And less customer contact. Sorry customers, you know I love you, but frankly, some of you drive me nuts.



Really want this transfer. . .

I look awesome!

Yep. I look awesome. I am officially down to a single digit pant size! I haven't been this thin in 13 years. It feels great. Now that I'm at the size I want, time to tone up what I have. Of course that means exercise, which is yuck, so maybe I'll just be a flubby size 9. I've had to buy new work pants and new jeans. I know. Shopping is such a big hardship, right?

I Love (Hate) Pinterest

Things I hate about Pinterest:

1. Calling food "crack."
2. Saying that everything is "GENIUS!"
3. Stupid baby names: Bexley? What??
4. "Pin now. Read later." Um, excuse me? I can read it now if I want. Why are you telling me what to do? Or maybe you just don't want me to look now because you're leading me to a malicious site. . . or, or PORN! Yeah, I'm going to read now, pin later (but only if I want to).
5. Overexplaining (Is that even a word?) in the description. Yes we can see that is a pink shirt. You don't have to write "PINK SHIRT" in the description.

I spend a lot, and I mean A LOT, of time on Pinterest. I've found tons of awesome stuff. I do love it even though I spend most of the time muttering about idiots and stupid people.

It Was a Tony Stark Kind of Day. . . At First

MomVader's log: Star Date 1.25.13.20.41
It has been 13 days since my last entry. Things are bleak. The temperature has plummeted and some cold white substance covers the ground. I am afraid to touch it because it may be dangerous. Some of our crew members have been struck by some sickness, possibly a strain of influenza. Supplies are running low but transport is too dangerous.

So, basically I haven't written in a while. It's freezing and snowy. Belle has the flu. I need to go shopping but I hate driving on the slick roads with the crazy people.

On the bright side, today was payday.

Now, we're broke. After I paid all of the bills and bought the stuff we need I suddenly remembered that Riley had a $70 spirit wear oder due. Blah. I love that she is a cheerleader but her stuff is SO expensive.

Baby Got Back

Ah, Rose is finally better. Payday has happened. 59 degrees here right now. . . in Northern Pennsylvania. . . in January. T-shirt weather for us. I have this lovely warm weekend off work. Thank goodness!

So I lost a bit of weight the past few months. I'm pear-shaped so we all know what that means. The boobies go away first. Bummer. I went to buy a couple new bras this morning. Yeah, no. I just couldn't stomach the thought of buying the same size I wore in high school. Why can't the body burn fat in selective places? Face it. No matter how much weight I lose I am going to still have no chest and a big butt.

He's cool with it.

On the plus side, I bought a teal green wool coat for $19!

I have a lot to do today but it doesn't seem so bad because of the awesome heat wave we're having.

Going to watch Riley cheer in a little bit then more shopping later. Making chicken enchiladas for dinner then yoga (sorry for the non-yoga week YogaMan. It's been crazy). After all of that, maybe movie night with my family. All is right in my little world today.

Two Big Days (Puke Story and a Super Boring Day)

Yesterday started out with a bang. Grocery shopping. Bane of my existence. There isn't much I hate more than a trip to the grocery store. So, Kaellyn and I made a menu for the week, right down to snacks and desserts. We thought we did great. Looked at it and thought it might be around $150. Um, no. I got out of there with $300 worth of groceries. Yeah, I don't have $1,200 per month for food. Looks like I need to rethink this a bit. I just like lots of healthy food. Lots. . . of. . . food!

So the days goes on as usual. Pick up the kids from school, have a snack, do homework, make dinner, hang out, give the kids a bath. EVERYONE WAS FINE! Twenty minutes after her bath Rose looks at me and says, "I have to puke." How could she go from absolutely fine to sicker than a dog in 20 minutes?

DarthDad had to go to work so I put her in bed with me. She ended up throwing up on the carpet off the side of the bed. A lot of throwing up. I do not handle vomit like a champ and DarthDad was gone so I go into panic mode. Luckily, Kaellyn has a strong stomach and can handle the situation. In the ten minutes I was running around trying to figure out what to do, she had it cleaned up and the carpet shampooed. It got easier as the night went on though. I shared a bed with Rose and a big pan. I got next to no sleep.

This morning was exciting. I was trying to get ready for work and get Rhys and Belle ready for school while Rose was hogging the bathroom with her sick self. Needless to say, I didn't look very nice today. A braid and yesterday's makeup. Awesome. Rose was sad because she had to miss school. She loves school. As she kneeled there with her head in the toilet, she was asking to go to school. I felt so bad for her.

Working today after not sleeping last night was awful. We have inventory tomorrow so there was a million things to do. I got a ton of stuff done, which was surprising considering I was a zombie today.

It was in the 40s today (super warm for January in NWPA) but it was so damn windy that I still froze to death when I picked up the kids. Belle gets out at 2:25 and the others are supposed to get out at 2:30 but Rhys's teacher kept them in until 2:40. When will teachers realize that it doesn't punish the students? It punishes the family that is waiting for the student. It's annoying.

Now it's 7:00PM. I'm exhausted. I haven't had a bath. I haven't done yoga in two days thanks to all of the sickness going around (Sorry YogaMan). I'm going to bed! Naw, just kidding. I can't go to bed until the kids go to bed. In two hours. Two long, miserable hours.